Just in time for Halloween..

I didn't intend to do a special Halloween recipe post, but it just sort of happened. Last night I decided to make some sesame cookies, so I did. That's not really the blog-worthy part. I made the dough, rolled them into logs and rolled the logs in sesame seeds. Along the way I began to notice something funny. Totally without intending it, I was making cat turd cookies. Granted, the color was wrong, but the shape and texture resembled cat turds rolled in kitty litter. They did not look like that in the recipe, but I guess I made them longer and skinnier. And I have three cats, including a very constipated one, who coincidentally had to go to the vet today. And for the vet visit I needed to take along a stool sample. So at the end of the evening I had a large bag of cookies that looked like cat turds, and an actual small bag of cat turds. I wasn't too grossed out to eat the cookies, but if I make them again I am going to shape them into balls, and skip the sesame seeds.
Anyway, since I am sick and twisted and happen to know that one of you lives with a bunch of evil cats and is having a halloween party, I decided to share the experience. So, if you should decide to make cat turd cookies for a Halloween party, take the above recipe, skip the anise and add a spoonful or two of cocoa, roll the cookies in sesame seeds, and bake. Serve the cookies on a plate covered with sesame seeds for the ultimate in gross looking party food.

Dear People of Match: Special Toothbrush Etiquette Edition

Dear People of Match: In the event that you meet someone online and happen to go home with him/her, do not use any toothbrushes that might be lying around in the guest bathroom unless they are still in their original packaging. I don’t care if they are Oral-B’s, they are not intended for pre-nookie hoochie cleansing, or anything else for that matter.
Thank you,
-Old Biddy

In my sheltered existence, I have never had to worry about the fate of my toothbrush. It never even occurred to keep my toiletry kit in a safe place when I visited my brother. However, when staying with my brother and his buddy/roommate/landlord Herb at their bachelor pad, some things should not be taken for granted.
The big spring training tailgate bash was on Saturday. A good time was had by all. Herb had invited a Match.com date to come party with us. She brought a friend. They unintentionally provided a lot of stories and blog posts. Herb and Match Date (MD) were drunk off their asses and things degenerated into a lot of PDA’s. We left them at the bar around 9 and headed out.
After a day of sun and drinking, I was pretty sleepy since I was still on east coast time and am an old biddy. My brother dropped me off before going over to the afterparty, which was a few blocks away. I had the foresight to ask my brother for a pair of earplugs – I may be an old biddy but I am not completely clueless. And, since he lives with Herb, my brother has lots of earplugs. I took a shower and was about to go to sleep when Herb and MD showed up. She was very drunk and very loud. I heard her go into the bathroom, run the water for a long time, and then she returned to the living room and announce that she had used the toothbrush that was in the guest bathroom to clean something. Fortunately or unfortunately, I did not hear exactly what she used it for, but I suspect out that it was not her teeth, because if it were your teeth why would you announce that you cleaned something with it? Not that it really mattered, since there was no way in hell I was ever using it again, even though there was a 50% chance that she had used my brother’s toothbrush rather than mine. I put in the earplugs and went to sleep.
Some things run in the family, including a fondness for telling funny stories, so Herb is not going to live this one down for a long time.