Dear readers, you may be wondering if I ever heard back from Wankercon. Well, indeed I did. On Tuesday, I got the following email. I also got a phone call but they didn't leave a message.
Hi Old Biddy,
I got your contact from Prof X, who we collaborate
closely on one of our projects. He said that you have many years of
experience in organometallic chemistry and recommended we reach out to
you to ask you if you know of anyone in the field who would be a great
fit for Wankercon. We are a start up so ideal person would be very high
energy, proactive, passionate about the mission of the company,
talented technically and somebody who loves to solve interesting
challenges. Just wanted to stress that we are more interested in
attracting passionate and talented people rather than finding a
specific skill set. (Uh dudes, you might want to get rid of the stupid "7 questions" screening email. Just a thought. Besides, I thought it was pretty clear that I was passionate about synthetic chemistry and "Animal House"))
About the company, Wankercon is more of a mission with a company rather
than the other way around, and that mission is to turn biology into an
information science, and ultimately to cure all diseases. Wankercon has
developed a nanorobotic DNA manipulation technology that is the best thing since sliced bread.(ok, I changed the wording slightly, the original was a much bigger exaggeration)
For a broad preview of what Wankercon does, watch this video of our
scientific advisory board member Big Wanker at SpaceX last
year. Note that we are no longer just five guys in a garage. (link omitted)
Please keep us in mind, and we appreciate any suggestions you may have.
Kind regards,
A Wanker
Uh, ok. Granted, Prof X may've told them I've got something lined up, but even if he had, would it kill them to do a phone interview or even pretend like they're considering me for the position?!?! They've only had my resume for four months. If they had my resume, they probably had resumes from my coworkers. Guess what - most of us have found jobs. I'm all for networking, and have even told colleagues about open positions that I myself was applying for. However, I do that for normal companies with normal search procedures. Wankercon is not normal. So I took my time and wrote back to them today. Here's what I wrote.
Hi A Wanker,
Thanks for the email. I'm currently in negotiations on a job offer, and most of my former colleagues have already located employment. However, I believe that so+so* is still looking for a job. She is local and is a talented organometallic and polymer chemist. Her professional profile is available on LinkedIn (link omitted) You may also want to contact some of the inorganic faculty at local UC school. Professors Larry, Curly, and Moe are well-known chemists and they may have some students or postdocs who are looking for employment.
I hope this helps. Best of luck with everything!
-Old Biddy
* hopefully so+so has already found a job. I'm going to send her an email just to warn her.
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